Horror in the Shower


I failed to make sure my daughter was ready for adulting. Or at least the zombie apocalypse. Or this week: tiny spiders..

Spider intervention was not on the curriculum for my girl, obviously until … My daughter had a major problem in her first apartment today. She thinks she is going to be okay with being an an adult – she took care of a spider in her bathtub and didn’t die. I just listen and plan on telling my horror story… It’s more impressive than hers . Read them both and you decide ,dear reader .

Mine :

I was probably 22 at one time haha and faced a similar problem once. I’m talking about the spider in my bathtub – it was the biggest spider in the world. Here’s how that transpired: It was 4:30 in the morning and I had to shower for work. I didn’t have a clue what I was going to do with it except the obvious: Wake my grandfather up and have him take care of it. He wasn’t happy with me and I was sorry for having to wake him up but…He asked me why I didn’t drown it… but it was too big. I pointed at spiderhim. My grandfather was impressed by the size.

My daughter:

She sees a spider in her tub- a black spider with a red spot and thinks it’s a black widow. Omg the horror. She runs. Out the front door with her MacBook and Googles the information. She soon knew that the spider was an adorable little shy jumper. Nothing like black widows who are scary. Then , I have to listen to more than a few minutes on this spider and a half hour on bug bombs.My husband and agree she could not have one or three like she says.After careful deliberation on going to ask the office if she could kill all the spiders in Lubbock, Texas… I tell her that they will probably exterminate for her. Spiders, people. Bless her heart- she is a spoiled little thing but it amazes me how appreciative she is…she brags on the office and how maintenance already has taken care of her leaky dishwasher.Now she is speechless with joy ).

Also she has a friend whose mom makes homemade bug spray. You have no idea how exciting this is for her.All this after panicking and running from the bathroom and out the door for 30 minutes because she has no idea what to do.

She chose survival .

Really ,she has no idea where the itsy bitsy spider is – she assumed it ran down the drain on its own – I don’t tell her it’s probably hiding from her in the bathroom.

You know you are laughing because it’s funny.

She somberly says that she probably scared him to death.And laughs.So the dramatics and squeaking and operatic wailing were not in vain, and the spider isn’t either.

I tell her my story .She shudders and says “East Texas must suck .”

There you go ,people- the future of our country.

*editors note: Rowen is also 22 and not as tough as her badass mom .

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